Believe it or not, there are a lot of people-haters nowadays. For some reason, we hate people because of the way they act, speak or talk. And when I have those days in the month, I hate my own mother so you can just imagine how I feel about strangers.

The harsh truth is that people will piss us off and let us down. That’s the way that cookie crumbles. It’s up to us how we are going to react in certain situations when we don’t feel so comfortable.

Here are some situations that make me feel like a freaking monster. So, keep reading if you feel my pain!

 

1. When someone sits next to me in a public place, I just pray to God that they don’t start talking to me.

And then they start. And I would rather take their heads off.

Why do people like to talk to strangers? Just leave me alone if you don’t know me. Maybe I am meditating or something, so just back off, okay?

 

2. I hate every small place where I am stuck with people.

Elevators, toilets, and waiting in line—it just makes me feel nervous. The worst feeling is when I am standing in line in a post office and there is an old guy behind me sniffing my neck.

I am positive that he didn’t take a shower for at least two days and from his awful breath, I could faint in front of him. Hey, it’s the 21st century and yes, there is enough water for all of us.

 

3. I hate when someone tries to talk to me while I am wearing headphones.

I mean, SERIOUSLY dude? Don’t you see my freaking headphones on? For those who don’t understand my serious look, I give that ‘resting bitch’ look. That’s my secret weapon and it always works.

 

4. Meeting new people is a pain in the butt for me.

Period. I simply think of negative things only. Even the smallest stuff annoys me, like she is too tall or too blond, he chews too loud or has an annoying voice. The list goes on and on.

 

5. I hate fucking group texts.

I hate the guy who invented this shit. Don’t you know I hate those messages of hope and happiness? And especially in a group of people I actually don’t know. When I get a notification like this, honestly I bite, so don’t mess around with me.

 

6. The most annoying sound is a sound of a man who sneezes a couple of times in a row.

OMG how I hate that. And to make things worse, he does that in front of me and he is not trying to cover his mouth. Like I like having a sore throat or pneumonia. And the Grand Finale is when he touches the door and leaves all his bacteria on it. I am speechless.

 

7. I HATE eating in a restaurant close to someone else.

If I wanted people to listen to my secrets, I would have gone to holy confession instead of a restaurant. So leave me alone to eat my dish and talk normally with my friends. Am I asking too much? I thought so!

 

8. I have absolutely no patience for anything.

No matter if I am in a waiting line or at the doctor’s, I am so freaking nervous. I wish I was the only person there and they had to treat me like a queen. But, let’s be real, that is only happening in fairytales and unfortunately, I’m not part of one. Too bad.

 

9. I hate talking to people over the phone.

But those are not just ordinary people. Those are emotional vampires who just call to tell me how their day was awful. The last thing I need is to listen to your problems when my own are even bigger. So, back off, okay? Thank you!

 

10. Sarcasm saved me so many times.

If I told people what I actually think about them, I am sure they would never speak to me again. Thank God for inventing sarcasm!